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// 6514
//== Interlude: Personal Financial Management
// 6515
//“But Headmaster,” Harry argued, some of his desperation leaking into his voice,
//“leaving all of my assets in one undiversified vault full of gold coins - it’s
//crazy, Headmaster! It’s like, I don’t know, doing Transfiguration experiments
//without consulting a recognized authority! You just don’t do that with money!”
// 6516
//From the lined face of the old wizard - underneath a festive holiday hat like a
//catastrophic automobile collision between cars of green and red cloth - a
//grave, sad look peered out at Harry.
// 6517
//“I’m sorry, Harry,” said Dumbledore, “and I do apologize, but allowing you
//control over your own finances would give you far too much independence of
//action.”
// 6518
//Harry’s mouth opened and no sound came out. He was, literally, speechless.
// 6519
//“I will permit you to withdraw five Galleons for Christmas presents,” said
//Dumbledore, “which is more than any boy your age should spend, but poses no
//threat, I think -”
// 6520
//“__I can’t believe you just said that!__” the words burst out of Harry’s
//mouth. “You __admit__ to being that manipulative?”
// 6521
//“Manipulative?” said the old wizard, smiling slightly. “No, manipulative would
//be if I did __not__ admit it, or if I had some deeper motive behind the
//obvious. This is quite straightforward, Harry. You are not yet ready to play
//the game, and it would be foolish to allow you thousands of Galleons with which
//to upset the gameboard.”
// 6522
//The bright hustle and bustle of Diagon Alley had increased by a hundredfold and
//redoubled as Christmas approached, with all the shops enshrouded in brilliant
//sorceries that flashed and sparkled as though the season’s spirit was about to
//blaze out of control and turn the whole area into a cheerful holiday crater.
//The streets were so crowded with witches and wizards in festive and
//__loud__ clothing that your eyes were assaulted almost as severely as your
//ears; and it was clear, from the bewildering variety of the shoppers, that
//Diagon Alley was considered an international attraction. There were witches
//wrapped in giant swathes of cloth like toweled mummies, and wizards in formal
//top hats and bath-robes, and young children barely past toddling age who were
//decorated with lights that blazed almost as bright as the shops themselves, as
//their parents took them hand in hand through that magic wonderland and let them
//shriek to their heart’s content. It was the season to be merry.
// 6523
//And in the midst of all that light and cheer, a note of blackest night; a cold,
//dark atmosphere that cleared a few precious paces of distance even in the midst
//of all that crush.
// 6524
//“No,” said Professor Quirrell, with a look of grim revulsion, like he’d just
//bitten into food that not only tasted horrible but was morally repugnant to
//boot. It was the sort of grim face an ordinary person might make after biting
//into a meat pie, and discovering that it was rotten and had been made from
//kittens.
// 6525
//“Oh, come __on__,” Harry said. “You must have __some__ ideas.”
// 6526
//“Mr. Potter,” Professor Quirrell said, his lips set in a thin line, “I agreed
//to act as your adult guardian on this expedition. I did not agree to advise you
//on your choice of presents. I don’t do Christmas, Mr. Potter.”
// 6527
//“How about Newtonmas?” Harry said brightly. “Isaac Newton actually __was__
//born on December 25th, unlike some other historical figures I could name.”
// 6528
//This failed to impress Professor Quirrell.
// 6529
//“Look,” said Harry, “I’m sorry, but I’ve got to do __something__ special
//for Fred and George and I’ve got no idea of my options.”
// 6530
//Professor Quirrell made a thoughtful humming sound. “You could ask which family
//members they most dislike, and then hire an assassin. I know someone from a
//certain government-in-exile who is quite competent, and he would give you a
//discount on multiple Weasleys.”
// 6531
//“__This__ Christmas,” Harry said, dropping his voice into a lower
//register, “give your friends the gift… of __death__.”
// 6532
//That made Professor Quirrell smile. It went all the way to his eyes.
// 6533
//“Well,” said Harry, “at least you didn’t suggest getting them a pet rat -”
//Harry’s mouth snapped shut, and he was regretting the words almost as soon as
//they were out of his mouth.
// 6534
//“Pardon me?” said Professor Quirrell.
// 6535
//“Nothing,” Harry said at once, “long dumb story.” And telling it seemed wrong
//somehow, maybe because Harry was afraid Professor Quirrell would have laughed
//even if Bill Weasley __hadn’t__ been cured and everything put back to
//right…
// 6536
//And where had Professor Quirrell __been__ that he’d never heard the story?
//Harry had gotten the impression that everyone in magical Britain knew.
// 6537
//“Look,” said Harry, “I’m trying to __solidify their loyalty to me,__ you
//know? Make the Weasley twins my minions? Like the old saying goes: A friend
//isn’t someone you use once and then throw away, a friend is someone you use
//over and over again. Fred and George are two of the most useful friends I have
//in Hogwarts, Professor Quirrell, and I plan to use them over and over again. So
//if you’d help me be Slytherin here, and suggest something they might be
//__very__ grateful for…” Harry’s voice trailed off invitingly.
// 6538
//You just had to pitch these things the right way.
// 6539
//They walked on for a good way before Professor Quirrell spoke again, his voice
//practically dripping with distaste. “The Weasley twins are using secondhand
//wands, Mr. Potter. They would be reminded of your generosity with every Charm
//they cast.”
// 6540
//Harry clapped his hands together in involuntary excitement. Just put the money
//on account at Ollivander’s, and tell Mr. Ollivander to never refund it - no,
//better yet, to send it to Lucius Malfoy if the Weasley twins didn’t show up
//before the start of their next school year. “That’s __brilliant__,
//Professor!”
// 6541
//Professor Quirrell did not look like he appreciated the compliment. “I suppose
//I can tolerate Christmas in __that__ spirit, Mr. Potter, though only
//barely.” Then he smiled slightly. “Of course that will cost you fourteen
//Galleons, and you only have five.”
// 6542
//“__Five__ Galleons,” Harry said, with a sniff of outrage. “Just who does
//the Headmaster think he’s dealing with, anyway?”
// 6543
//“I think,” said Professor Quirrell, “that it simply did not occur to him to
//fear the consequences if you turned your ingenuity to the task of obtaining
//funds. Though you were wise to lose, rather than making it an explicit threat.
//Out of curiosity, Mr. Potter, what __would__ you have done if I hadn’t
//turned away in boredom while you, in a fit of childish pique, counted out five
//Galleons worth of Knuts?”
// 6544
//“Well, the easiest way would’ve been to borrow money from Draco Malfoy,” said
//Harry.
// 6545
//Professor Quirrell chuckled briefly. “Seriously, Mr. Potter.”
// 6546
//__Duly noted.__ “Probably I’d have done a few celebrity appearances. I
//wouldn’t resort to anything economically disruptive just for spending money.”
//Harry had checked, and he __would__ be allowed to keep the Time-Turner
//while he went home for the holidays, so that his sleep cycle didn’t start to
//rotate. But then it was __also__ possible that someone kept an eye out for
//magical day traders. The gold and silver trick would’ve taken work on the
//Muggle end, and seed funding, and the goblins might’ve gotten suspicious after
//the first cycle. And starting a real bank would be a __lot__ of work…
//Harry hadn’t __quite__ worked out any money-making methods that were fast
//__and__ certain __and__ safe, so he’d been very glad when Professor
//Quirrell had turned out to be so easily fooled.
// 6547
//“I do hope those five Galleons will be enough to last, since you counted them
//so carefully,” said Professor Quirrell. “I doubt the Headmaster shall be so
//eager to entrust me with your vault key a second time, once he discovers I’ve
//been tricked.”
// 6548
//“I’m sure you did your best,” Harry said with deep gratitude.
// 6549
//“Do you need any assistance finding a safe place to store all those Knuts, Mr.
//Potter?”
// 6550
//“Well, sort of,” said Harry. “Do you know of any good investment opportunities,
//Professor Quirrell?”
// 6551
//And the two of them walked on, in their tiny sphere of silence and isolation,
//through the brilliant and bustling crowds; and if you looked carefully, you
//would see that where they went, leafy boughs faded, and flowers withered, and
//children’s toys that played cheerful bells changed to lower and more ominous
//notes.
// 6552
//Harry __did__ notice, but he didn’t say anything, just smiled a little to
//himself.
// 6553
//Everyone had their own way of celebrating the holidays, and the Grinch was as
//much a part of Christmas as Santa.